Week 6- Water dosing of 12 c DTaP- CEASE Therapy Update

This is going to be a very short update from last week. Sooooo I thought we were done with 12c but Noah had an aggravation over last weekend. Our homeopath decided before we move up to 30c we should make sure to address this aggravation. We dosed him with the reaction protocol and the symptoms we were seeing disappeared. In fact, he did amazingly well in his therapy as soon as he received the water dosing. It really is exciting to see how well it works for him. So this week we are dosing Noah with 30c of the DTaP. FINALLY! I am ready to move forward. I am also nervous because I do think this is another KEY clearing for Noah. For him to respond so strong to such small doses tells me that this is another piece to our puzzle.

I will give another update to let you guys know how he reacts to his first dose of 30c.

Week 4 and 5 DTaP Clearing- CEASE Therapy Update- Still on 12c!!!

Time has slipped by and I forgot to give an update. Last week, because of Noah's continued aggravations, we decided to go straight to the reaction protocol with the 12c. This week we have been able to dose Noah on Monday and Thursday with the 12c. We still have seen some aggravations... mainly irritability, noise sensitivity and ear/nose drainage.

Now onto the gains we have been seeing: 

1) More words, talking, babbling. This has definitely picked up since starting the clearing. He is constantly using words, and trying to talk and babbling regularly where we never heard babbling before.

2) Eye contact has been amazing. This has faltered over the months but it is back and very strong. No hesitation at all.

3) Gross motor coordination has improved. He seems to just be moving better since the clearing started. Going up stairs, climbing, we have definitely seen an improvement.

Our plan for next week is to dose Noah one time with the 30c... I will post next week on how that dose goes and any aggravations and gains we may see.

Week 3 DTaP Clearing- CEASE Therapy Update

I wanted to give everyone a quick update on the DTaP clearing. Noah was dosed again with 12c on Monday and once again we saw many aggravations: irritability, crying at the drop of a dime, stimming (vocal and visual), an increase in rituals, itching/picking at scabs and a return of facial tics. All from 12c!

We ended up only dosing Noah 1x this week. Our homeopath had advised us to do the dilution protocol to help him push through the issues, however he began to improve so much she told us to hold off until we see how he does next week, when we will dose him again with 12c. If he struggles with next week's dose we will go ahead and try the dilution protocol.

I am not sure if I have seen gains during this level of clearing. He does appear to be more connected to us and willing to give eye contact which has been awesome. One new thing that happened this week was that Noah walked up our staircase correctly and with ease and without any assistance or prompting. We were shocked when we witnessed it-- it came out of nowhere! I am not sure that is related to the clearing but it was so nice to see.

I will continue to post regular updates as we move through this DTaP clearing and work towards recovery and health for little Noah.

Week 2 DTaP Clearing- CEASE Therapy Update

We dosed Noah this week with a prep dose of 12c DTaP on Monday afternoon. We did not see a reaction with last week's small dose, however this week within hours of giving this dose he had a mild fever and was pretty miserable and not feeling well. He continues to be more emotional than usual this week and last night his insomnia which we have been struggling since his birth returned. During our two month break from clearings Noah had started to sleep like a baby. This was one aggravation I was not excited about it. I just knew that we would suffer through more nights of insomnia once clearings resumed. He woke up last night and just cried and cried and cried. I tried everything I could think of--- rescue remedy, calms forte, teething tablets... nothing seemed to calm him. He also began to itch a scab constantly. It isn't a new scab, it is healing and does not look infected or inflamed. I feel that his anxiety was causing him to pick at it. Today he was scratching his skin constantly.

Our homeopath wants us to wait to dose Noah again with 12c. We are going to give his body a break and resume next week. In the meantime, we are going to give him one of his constitutional remedies, kali sulph and kali phos, and put him in an epsom salt bath to help calm this aggravation. 

I will give you guys another update as we continue on this journey of clearing DTaP and using CEASE therapy to recover our son.

Week 1 DTaP Clearing- CEASE Therapy Update

We are finally back and have started the dreaded DTaP clearing. Noah was dosed on Monday and Thursday with a prep dose of 30x. And I was expecting the worst as we had a reaction immediately to the 30x of Hep B. And I waited and waited and nothing eventful. I know that this is just the very beginning and there will probably be reactions to come down the way. The only difference I saw was that Noah was more emotional than usual. He would have little breakdowns randomly throughout the day for no apparent reason.

Noah continues to do great. After the first month of our break he started doing so much better and I see him develop more and more each week. A few nights ago as we were heading to bed Noah kept asking for a cookie--- "cookie". When we told him no and explained that it was time for bed he then said "cookie please". Still we did not give him a cookie so he tried even harder and said "I want a cookie please". And if that wasn't amazing enough, he then said "I want a cookie and then night night." This little boy was bargaining with us! I just could not believe a short while ago he wasn't even talking and now we are seeing so many wonderful gains. I am just so thankful.

As we start this next clearing I will make sure to post weekly updates giving everyone the details of aggravations and gains from the DTaP. I am excited and nervous for this next chapter in our journey.

Quick CEASE Update and visiting DAN! Doctor

So our 3 week break from CEASE has turned into a 2 month break. Life happens and it has impacted our CEASE plans. From work changes to sicknesses, to a sprained neck last week I have not had the energy to commit to CEASE. Thankfully, I am feeling much better and I am gearing up to start the DTaP clearing with Noah next week. We have all of the remedies and we are starting back his vitamin C this week. I will keep everyone posted on how our first week back goes.

Today was an amazing day! We all took the day off today and went to Richmond VA to see a well known DAN! doctor. Before our doctor's appointment I decided I wanted to try and schedule a haircut for Noah at a children's salon in Richmond I had heard great things about. I was prepared for possible issues with the haircut because he has had such a problem with sensory issues around his head. He hates washing his hair, brushing his hair and has freaked out when I have tried to cut his hair. Well today he did AMAZING. No issues AT ALL! I was stunned! He sat in a little red jeep, watching a Barney video and eating cookies and could have cared less that his hair was getting cut! I am so thrilled about this!!!! And he looks like a clean cut little man.

Then we went to the DAN! doctor appt. The reason I wanted Noah to meet with this doctor was so that  testing could be done. Don't get me wrong, I am very pleased with CEASE and homeopathy but I would love to know what is going on internally in Noah's body--- does he have bad bacteria and yeast in his gut? Don't know... does he have high levels of metal in his body? no clue.... is he allergic to any foods? Or deficient in vitamins and minerals? So, that is my main reasoning. Once I learn what is going on I hope that homeopathy will continue to address some of these issues. One thing the DAN! doctor said during our 2 hour meeting floored me and was so encouraging- She said "I believe you guys are going to pull him out of this." She feels that recovery is a great possibility for Noah. She said he will only "get better and better" with the proper interventions. So that was so good to hear. I already felt it in my heart but having confirmation was so encouraging.

So that is a quick update on how things have been. I am nervous about the next clearing but very excited to see what is in store for Noah. He is just blossoming right now and I know with more time and healing we will see great things.

Mission: Self Care

I think the topic of self care is so important for anyone. Any mother out there knows that life changes when you have children. And if you happen to be a mother who has a child with a disability, like autism, well the idea of self care can at times feel non existent. It least, in my case that is how it has been.

I have been challenging myself these last few months to care about me. To really understand that I deserve to feel good, to be happy, to do things that aren't autism related. I can honestly say that I feel like I am a shell of my former self. I don't even recognize the face looking at me in the mirror. I have gone to battle and my body, my energy shows it. I don't want autism to destroy me... I don't want autism to win.

And it is this simple:

Happy and healthy mother= Happy Noah

Happy and healthy wife= Happy husband

I deserve to be happy and healthy. I am an important piece to the puzzle of my son's recovery.

So, what have I been doing to change this?

Well, it has been baby steps. About 4 months ago I was treated by our homeopath for depression, anxiety and hormonal problems. I can honestly say this alone helped me tremendously.

I also have been on a mission to reduce our toxin exposure (see previous post). I went on a detox and boy did I detox! We are utilizing respite and going out as a couple more. I am reaching out to friends and mother's in the autism and CEASE therapy community. I feel so much better knowing I have people who can relate to what we are going through. I am starting to exercise again on a regular basis. I am rejoining the world of the living in a way. Grief and depression took me over for a while but I am coming out of it now.

I hope this post encourages others to put themselves back on their "to do" list. We are important.

Our "Wish List" for the DTaP Clearing and a Few Updates on Noah

I am so thankful that we are finally moving past the bad weeks we had with Noah. I still am not sure what caused the issues we saw (vomiting, loss of appetite, intense stimming, a weird rash on his back, increase in sensory issues etc). Was it due to the Hep B clear we just wrapped up? Was it a virus? Regression? A mix of all? What I find to be the most interesting is that Noah appeared much worse (behavior, sickness) during our break than any time during the Hep B clearing. It got to the point where I was considering asking the homeopath to let us continue on with Hep B. I really do believe we will need to revisit this clearing again in the future.

He has not vomited since this past Tuesday. I started to notice that he would vomit when drinking his almond milk, specifically when I would add his daily vitamin c supplement to it. He has never had a problem with his vitamin c... he has been taking 500 mg a day for the last few months... but I googled the symptoms of too much vitamin c and in addition to the diarrhea I had heard about, vomiting and nausea can also result from too much vitamin c. I stopped the vitamin c and have not seen any more vomiting. I hope to start it back in a few weeks gradually. But for now I am giving his stomach a break.

His "food jag" seems to have resolved for the most part as well. His occupational therapist told me that a food jag is when a child limits his foods to only 1 or 2 foods. Noah was always a picky eater, he eats about 10 foods... I noticed over the last 4 weeks that he started refusing his bananas, yogurt, apple sauce, cereal, even his favorite chocolate pudding! Yikes. It freaked me out. Especially when I heard his little tummy growling and yet he still refused almost all foods. At one point I was lucky if he ate oatmeal in the morning and a cookie for the day.  Our OT gave me some direction on how to deal with it. The KEY was to make sure we were always changing the foods he did eat--- for example, every day in his oatmeal, I changed the time I fed it to him, the bowl I used... I would add different fruits in it each day to change the flavor... I would add almond butter, peaches, apple sauce and slices of banana. It did seem to work because within two weeks he was reintroducing other foods back into his diet.

We also have finally found a multivitamin that Noah tolerates. It is from The Honest Company and it is a powder that can easily be mixed in drinks and foods. So now I can at least know he is getting a supplement to help offset the lack of fruits and vegetables in his diet. And the best part is that the supplement is safe without any harmful ingredients, which is not the case for many children's vitamins.

Another HUGE development for Noah is that he has stopped using a bottle!!!!! SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS ONE!!!!!!!! We were able to discontinue the bottle use during his vomiting and he hasn't requested it. In other news, we just purchased a little boy doll for Noah hoping that he would connect to it better than the boy baby doll he has. It is cute, with crazy hair, and looks a lot like Noah. Noah loves his boy doll. He smiles lovingly at it, calls it "a boy", and just the other day he started moving his arm up and down and saying "Hi" and "bye". He also has given it hugs and kisses. So cute!

OUR WISH LIST FOR the DTaP Clear:

We still have a few more weeks before we start another clearing (we got an extension from our homeopath!). We will tackle the DTaP next. Here are the areas that I pray are healed with this clearing:

1) Eye contact- Noah goes through periods of amazing eye contact and then it stops. This is a hard one for me. Who knew eye contact was so important!? When he won't look at me I feel disconnected from him and I realize how much he is missing out on by not looking at people. I pray his eye contact improves during this next clearing.

2) Sensory issues-- this is a big one for Noah. Grooming and eating are big issues that we struggle with, all related to sensory overload. Brushing his hair, brushing his teeth, cutting his nails, bathing, washing his hair, eating are all impacted by this sensory processing disorder. I pray that this clearing helps these issues as well.

3) Developmental delay and speech- Noah still struggles to communicate... he is doing great with labeling and repeating what he hears but he struggles with using language to communicate. Echolalia is emerging. If I ask him a questions he will repeat back to me the last word. He still struggles to understand what people are saying to him. He also does not have much imaginative play.

4) Rituals/OCD behaviors--  this has emerged over the last 6 months and it is becoming a pretty big problem. Every song Noah hears he has elaborate rituals that he does to the music. A stranger may not notice him even doing it but I have realized that as soon as we get to a certain point in the song Noah will go to a certain area of the room, touch a chair and then move to another area and touch his toe to a spot on the area rug. He flips out when I disrupt this ritual. He also is turning in circles and doing side eyes throughout the house on a regular basis.

5) Insomnia- I pray that with this next clearing we will see some change with his sleep problems. During the Hep B it was a constant issue for us. I know this is a big area that needs healing-- he did not sleep for the first 15 months of his life. I pray that his insomnia resolves and he begins to sleep through the night.

I know this is a big list and may seem unrealistic to those reading. I just know that with God ANYTHING is possible. I am praying for miracles, for healing. I am trusting that the Lord will continue to direct our steps and lead us to the best interventions for Noah. I know in my heart that CEASE therapy is one of those interventions. I am certain if we continue on we will continue to see more healing and recovery.

Update on Noah- Taking a "Break"

I don't know what I was envisioning for our 3 week break from CEASE... I guess I was thinking that Noah would feel good and we would have a break from the normal clearing symptoms we have become so used to these last 6 months. Well, unfortunately that is not the case!

We are in week 2 of our break and Noah has been struggling throughout the last week and a half since his last dosing of Hep B 10m. It started last Monday, with irritability, lack of appetite, insomnia-- Noah didn't seem like himself. His face was flushed and I saw him rubbing his ears. As the week went on his stimming hit new heights (now he is turning in circles constantly)... he was so irritable and zoned out as well. His appetite went down the tubes. He started refusing the foods he usually eats. He is now only eating oatmeal, chocolate pudding and gluten free cookies and juice  (not the most nutritious!). Then he started vomiting on Saturday when he drinks anything and he hasn't stopped. His stomach has been hurting him and he is very gaseous. He threw up twice today. I am trying not to over react and let this play itself out but it is hard to see him not feeling well.

I am still unsure if this is all from the last dose of Hep B 10m or if this was a result of a virus. Hopefully next time I post we will have seen positive gains from this yucky time.

Hep B Clearing Recap- CEASE Therapy

I am so happy to report that last Friday we dosed Noah with the last dose of Hep B 10m!!!! It took 6 LONG months but we finally completed it. I feel good about what has been accomplished so far but I know we still have much more to clear, much more healing needs to take place. We continue to work towards complete healing and full recovery for Noah.

I thought it may be helpful to the readers to see a summary of how the Hep B clearing went for our son over these last 6 months.

I will start with a list of the aggravations we saw throughout the 6 months. I will note that aggravations typically did not stay more than a week and then would disappear, some appeared/disappeared within a day. Also, not all children will respond this exact way to the clearing. These symptoms were unique to Noah. Aggravations can range from mild to strong. We saw both during the 6 months. I know this list will look scary but it wasn't as bad as it looks. The gains were most definitely worth all of the aggravations!

AGGRAVATIONS:

intestinal issues- gas, bloating, diarrhea and toxic smelling diapers
ear infections
colds, coughs, nose and ear duct draining
fever
vomiting
lethargy
rashes- eczema, sores, severe diaper rashes
insomnia
emotional reactions- anger, sadness, fear, tantrums, high pitch screaming
swelling of his lips
return of old symptoms we saw when he was 9 months to 15 months: facial tics, limping, and shaking head left to right
increase in stimming- side eyes, pacing, rituals
noise sensitivity- holding ears to block out noise
loss of appetite
OCD type behaviors
lack of eye contact
biting
excessive thirst
rubbing face into floor, licking floor (I know, this freaked me out!)

And now onto the GAINS we saw during the 6 months on the Hep B clearing. The gains were fairly regular, occurring almost weekly. We noticed that every time Noah responded strongly to a dose, he would have a pretty strong gain afterwards. This may not be the case for all children, but this was our experience.

GAINS:

The "fog" he was in disappeared! He became present, alert, aware of his surroundings, of people and objects that he never noticed before. Once the fog disappeared learning and therapy really seemed to sink in for him. His learning took off and his development, which had stalled, started progressing.

Social Anxiety disappeared- He used to have extreme anxiety around strangers and other children. So bad that we could not attend church or leave him at a babysitters house. He cried constantly when he went to Gymboree. Now, he loves being around other children and doing activities in the community. He still is shy around new people who enter his home but it is not how it used to be.

We saw significant improvements in receptive language. In February of this year, before CEASE began, he tested at a 6 month level for receptive language. Now he is scoring in the 18-24 month range!  That is a huge leap in development.

His expressive language emerged!!!! It felt like I was pulling teeth to get Noah to even say a few words a day before he started CEASE. He struggled to spit a word out. Then, 6 weeks into the clearing he started talking and every week since his language has continued to improve. In February he tested at 12 months for expressive language. Now he is testing at 18-24 months range. He is easily identifying objects and repeating what he hears. We are still working on using words to communicate with others, making requests and such. Two and three word phrases are beginning to emerge at this time.

And lastly his overall development has jumped forward. We have seen improvements with gross and fine motor skills, play skills, self help skills, and we are starting to see the emergence of imaginative play. He is scoring within the normal range in all of these areas now. In February he was still very behind, at around 15 months.

THERE is MUCH LEFT TO DO

I am so thankful for the healing that has taken place and the steps forward. I am ready to keep going though because we still are not at recovery. Still more to clear, still more healing that needs to take place.

We are taking a 3 week break to give Noah a much needed time off. After our break we will tackle the DTaP vaccination. I will continue to post through the next few weeks and give you more updates on Noah. We plan on continuing his vitamin C and his constitutional remedy on Saturdays.

Week 22 Hep B 10m- CEASE Update- Good Reports!!!!

We saw significant aggravations from the 1 dose of 10 m last week. By Monday, Noah had started to limp like he did when he was 15 months old. He also broke out in a red bumpy rash on his back and continued to have fowl smelling diarrhea. He was stimming pretty intensely as well with his side eyes and his posture and hand movements were also much more "floppy" and loose than usual. His eye contact had gone down the tube. Needless to say, he wasn't doing well with this dosing. So our homeopath had us do a dilution protocol with Noah from the 10m. He was dosed with this dilution 4 times in four hours. By Wednesday, his limping and diarrhea were gone. His eye contact has returned and he hasn't been as floppy in his walking and hand movements. The stimming does continue on but I have not noticed as many facial tics lately so that makes me hopeful that it isn't going to be a problem long term.

So, onto our good reports for the week: On Thursday, Noah's occupational therapist from Early Intervention came over to do the reassessment for Noah. She had to update where Noah is developmentally. I was so shocked to find out that in most areas Noah is scoring now in the 24 to 30 month range (he is 27 months!). His verbal, receptive and expressive are still delayed, probably closer to the 18-20 month range. We will know the numbers for sure in the next few weeks. When he was assessed at 15 months he was delayed in all areas except gross motor- Over 25% delay in all areas except gross motor. Wow! I am still in shock. I am absolutely sure this is the result of ALL of the interventions, and the day in day out, constant redirection and therapy we have given Noah. We have not stopped to get him well. And I am CERTAIN that if he did not receive CEASE therapy we would not have been nearly as far. I remember that in January (right before CEASE began) we had a review meeting with Early Intervention. At that time, we discussed his development and he appeared to be moving slowly forward after 5 months of EI. They told me that it took time and to not get discouraged. Then CEASE started and the fog was removed- He was able to learn! With the fog gone, he was aware of people, his surroundings, he understood more and he started to jump forward in development.

One area we continue to struggle with is Noah's receptive language. He understands many things but he is hit and miss with commands. He rarely comes to us when his name is called and if I asked him to give me the ball on the floor he would not understand to do that as well. However, if I say close the door, or let's go outside, or time to clean up or let's read a book, he does understand. If I ask him to say a certain word he tries. Our occupational therapist said that she think he understands more of what we are saying but he is either ignoring it or barely responding.

So, on Friday, as I was leaving for work, we were doing our normal "goodbye ritual" with Noah. Usually, I am very excited if he says "bye" and looks at me in the eyes. I am even more excited if he says "bye mommy".... so on this morning, Noah was not facing me, sitting on the floor playing with his toys. My mom told Noah "stand up, come give your momma a hug and say bye mommy." ( I thought to myself "yeah right, this will never happen!")..... and then Noah, without any additional prompting, got up from his toys, stood up and turned around, walked up to me, hugged me AND said "bye mommy" AND then walked me to the door!!!!!!!! I still am in disbelief!!!! This has never ever ever happened, except in my wildest dreams. I don't expect it to happen like this every day from here on out but I KNOW IT IS POSSIBLE and this alone gives me SO MUCH HOPE.

So that is it for this week! Pretty good stuff, huh? I will continue to post weekly updates as we treat our son with CEASE therapy and work towards recovery and healing. We will be taking a 3 week break when we wrap up Hep B. I spoke to our homeopath and the next clearing will be the DTaP.

One Year Ago Today...

One year ago today, my world came crashing down around me. My life, our life, has never been the same since.

That day, August 7, 2012, started off like any other day. I was getting ready to leave for work. My mother had just arrived to my home to care for Noah. She casually mentioned Noah's upcoming pediatrician visit and said to me "you should mention to the pediatrician that Noah is avoiding eye contact." Hearing this confirmed something deep inside of me that I had been brushing off for many many months. I had been uneasy about Noah for a long time, but I was dismissed by the doctor and other medical professionals on many occasions.

So, I went upstairs to my computer and typed into the Google search bar "toddler avoiding eye contact" and I was not prepared for what glared back at me----

AUTISM

My heart dropped. I searched frantically through the search entries, looking at all of the signs and symptoms of autism in a toddler....I tried to find any entry that eased my worry. But there weren't any. The more I read, the more I realized we had a huge problem. I was certain that Noah met all of the diagnostic criteria for a diagnosis of autism. I knew that very day what my son had. I kept this to myself because my husband and family would not have been prepared for this knife to the heart.

The agony that followed from knowing what my son had was nothing I have EVER experienced in my life. I called out from work for an entire week following that day. I could barely get out of bed (my family thought I had the flu). The grief swept over me......My only son had autism.... Every emotion poured over me: regrets, failure, fear, grief, and huge amounts of anxiety. I had severe depression and anxiety for over 6 months following this. And I continue to have bouts to this day. I cried all of the time- driving, at work, at home, in the shower, in my sleep even. I stopped eating. My husband had a hard time coming to terms with the possibility of his son having autism. My mother was in denial and we were constantly at odds. Everyone handles their grief in different ways. I handled it head on, they did not. This just made this time even more difficult for me.

Looking back over this last year, so much of it I cannot remember. The pain was so great that I don't recall much, except for key events and services that I fought to get for Noah. One thing I do recall vividly, is this intense DRIVE that took over my body...  I felt that I MUST find a way to pull Noah out of this dark hole that was consuming him. This drive propelled me to immediately start implementing interventions, finding help and services for my son. I fought for as many services as I possibly could get for him. Early Intervention was implemented (at my insistence- the pediatrician didn't think to do this either!), a diagnosis was made shortly after EI began and I worked hard so that Noah could get ABA therapy and his Medicaid Waiver. I hit dead ends, red tape, no answers. I knew more than the case managers, the doctors, the so called specialists- how can this be? This scares me because these "professionals" are supposed to help parents when this happens. I just did not find this in my experience.

I have been a social worker for many years and I have fought many fights on behalf of my clients. I have to say, this fight-- navigating through this broken system of services for my son to get him what he needed was the absolute HARDEST fight of my life. This just shouldn't be....

In February, Noah began ABA therapy and CEASE Therapy. This was a turning point for our family and for Noah. CEASE therapy removed the fog Noah was consumed in and ABA therapy helped Noah catch up on many things he had not yet learned. After every dose of Hep B, we saw aggravations and gains. By May, Noah had begun to talk. This was such an answer to my prayers.

I can now say that I see a distant light at the end of this tunnel. We have much farther to travel but I have hope to one day leave this dark place and see the day when my son is healed and fully recovered from this horrible condition. CEASE therapy has been the main intervention we have seen the most gains from. It is helping his body heal from vaccination injury. It is removing toxins that are hindering healthy development.

I must also say that the Lord was with me throughout this year when most of my friends and family disappeared. He was there comforting me in the darkness as I cried my heart out. And He is here still giving us the wisdom and strength to face each day and to have faith for our future.  I am so thankful to Him for his comfort, guidance and provision. I am so thankful for His healing. He is healing my son and he is healing my family.

Week 21 Hep B Clearing---Trust the Process

We dosed Noah with 10m on Monday. He continued to have diarrhea all throughout this week and the smell of it was toxic! We noticed the return of facial tics, stimming and a reduction in eye contact. He really was feeling distant again which always causes me anxiety to see. He is also tantruming more than usual-- is this just 2 year old behavior or more? not sure.

As far as positives: Noah said "I love you" this week! Without any prompting! Not sure if he understands what it means fully but I will take it :-) He also seems to pointing now to communicate. This is in the very early stages but I believe he is starting to get it. He has pointed to pictures in books but never as a way to communicate to others so this is a new development. And this past Saturday, Noah was an "all star" at his Gymboree class. He loved it and he didn't act up, or stim... he was appropriate the whole time, doing the activities all of the other children did. I was so proud of my little man. He has come such a long way.

As we are nearing the end of Hep B, I have been reflecting on this journey so far... the progress, the healing, the change in our little boy has been beyond amazing. Our son still has autism but he is not in a constant drugged up, zoned out, zombie state that he was. This clearing has taken that fog away and has allowed Noah's beautiful voice to come forth and learning to take place! The gains have been SO WORTH the aggravations. When I get discouraged about the new stimming behaviors and facial tics that appear to have gotten worse during this clear, I remember all of the GOOD things we have seen and experienced. I must TRUST THE PROCESS. There are layers that need to be pulled away and healed and we have peeled many of those layers away in this clearing.

I am just so thankful!!!!

I will continue to post weekly updates as we treat our son with CEASE therapy.

Week 19 and 20 Hep B Clearing- CEASE Therapy Update

I have been meaning to update the blog but life happens and I forget! So here is a recap of the last two weeks with the Hep B clearing.

Last week we were advised by our homeopath to dose Noah twice with the Hep B 1m. I have found that anytime we dose twice in a week we see pretty significant aggravations. And that is what happened. We did see an increase in stimming (side eyes, pacing), facial tics continued pretty strongly as well as shaking of his head, and a new behavior emerged, another stimming behavior I believe- He began to lay on the floor, and rubbed his face hard into the carpet and and he also licked the floor. Boy, that behavior really disturbed me! This was completely new and very scary! We also saw some pretty strange skin conditions pop up. He had a bad diaper rash, but when it healed it turned into eczema like dry patches. He also had little sores on his face and I noticed that he had hives that popped up one day and disappeared a few hours later. His eye contact was also poor last week. Once I informed our homeopath of these new developments she advised us to increase our dose of hep b to 10M the following week to help him "push through" what he was dealing with.

I dosed Noah with 10m on Monday and I was nervous. He was not acting like himself on Monday and was very distant, not wanting much to do with me. He looked sickly and appeared to be regressing. However, I am glad I listened to our homeopath! Boy, what a difference we have seen in Noah these past few days. We have seen a pretty significant decrease in the behaviors we were concerned about and his language continues to progress.  Now, we have a long ways to go with language but I am not going to complain at all! He is doing great with labeling and imitating words he hears. He is still working on the concept of language as a tool to communicate. He tries to sing songs when he is listening to music. He understands the concept of "more ______ please".... to request toys, food, etc. He doesn't yet call our names when he needs something- he strictly can label us-- when he sees a pictures of my husband or me he can say "dada" or "mama" but he has never used it to ask for us. I think this may be changing too. He actually came up to me today and said "mama"! He has also started saying "night night" and "good morning" as well these last few days. We are getting wonderful reports from all of his therapists on how well he is progressing. His ABA therapist says he is doing amazingly in his therapy when she takes him for circle time with other children at the center. This is such a huge change from the little boy who cried constantly when at the church nursery or Gymboree!!!! He used to have extreme anxiety but now he is present and loves being around other children.

So that is pretty much how these last few weeks have gone. I am very excited to continue on with this dose of Hep B and I am also excited about wrapping up this clearing. It has been a journey! And I am anxious to start the next clearing. I will continue to post updates regularly as we use CEASE therapy to help our son recover from autism.

Back In the Saddle and a Few Updates

I have had a few days to process my feelings, reflect on what occurred on Sunday and I have allowed myself time to cry... I am now ready to hop back on the saddle. I must do this. I have to press forward towards recovery and towards health and healing for Noah and for my family. I refuse to let autism rule my life or win. I refuse to allow it to take me and my family under.

In other news, I have evaluated where we are at with therapy and with interventions we are trying. We are starting to get comfortable, complacent.... Noah has been doing well, and even though we don't mean to, we start relaxing a bit when we see so much progress. I know that we have missed amping up our therapy routine and adding new, helpful interventions. The last few days I have looked through books and materials and plan to add new interventions and techniques to our daily routine with Noah. I am going to really put more of a focus on eating, bathing, self help skills and language. I will also be pulling interventions from the "verbal behavior" ABA approach.  Noah's diet is minimal and he doesn't eat many things due to his sensory problems. This is one area that we put on the "back burner" because we had so many other issues to tackle and we need to revisit it. Bathing has always been a problem... but it seems to get worse every bath we do. He used to sit in the bath for at least a few minutes and then cry until he got pulled out... now he won't even sit down. So, we must work on this and figure out a way to make him tolerate it.

Other updates: Today Noah had his first meeting with the school system to be evaluated for special education preschool. He won't have his official evaluation until September....

And thankfully, the Medicaid Waiver, has finally started covering personal care for Noah, which allows my mother to be paid by Medicaid for his care. This is huge and such a blessing. This frees up money so that we can afford ABA therapy costs. We pay almost $1000 a month for ABA, which is only 6 hours a week! We are so thankful for all of our blessings. I know the Lord is providing for us during this time.

Week 17 and 18- Hep B 1m Clearing CEASE Therapy Update- 3 Word Phrases, Drawing, Imitation!

For week 17 and 18 we dosed Noah once per week with Hep B 1m. He continues to respond to every single dose he is given. The aggravations these past two weeks were irritability, tantrums, horrible smelling diapers and more insomnia. I also believe that he is having yeast "die offs" which may be causing some of the insomnia we have been seeing. I have observed Noah scratching frantically at his stomach and the following morning he has had very "yeasty" looking diapers. Stimming behaviors have also continued- his new favorite behavior is doing his "side eyes"... this is driving us nuts and we pray it passes quickly.

My favorite part of the post is to tell everyone reading what resulted after the aggravations.... so, the large gains we have seen these past few weeks have been the beginning of some 3 word phrases and many more two word phrases. He also started drawing this week!!!! We have worked on this daily since he was 15 months--- he had absolutely no desire to do this... and then all of a sudden he started this past week and he loves it! This last month has been huge as far as development. His language is taking off, he is imitating with ease (verbal/actions), we are doing so much better with grooming, dressing, brushing teeth, walking up and down stairs.... the list goes on and on! Of course there is still much to tackle but we are moving closer! These gains have given my family much needed encouragement and hope for Noah's future. I am so thankful for the people that are on our "team" and that the Lord has guided us to CEASE therapy. I truly believe this therapy will help us recover/heal our son.

I will continue to post regular updates as we work to recover our son from autism using CEASE therapy.

We are Seeing Some Great Gains! Hep B 1M CEASE Therapy

Noah was dosed with Hep B 1M on Monday. Thankfully we have seen minimal aggravations this week. Now onto what we have seen as far as gains:

1) Imaginative Play- He is starting to understand this concept now... still in the beginning stages but we are getting there

2) Imitation of Actions- Noah has been doing great with verbal imitation but has never really paid attention enough to others to imitate what he sees people do. Not any more. He is started to mimic us. An example of this: He picked up a broom and started sweeping this week! Big deal!!!! This has never ever ever happened. We have worked on this for months without any movement... but all of a sudden he is paying attention and trying to imitate.

3) Singing to songs- He is really trying to sing along with his favorite songs--- no just one word, but many words!

4) Tricycle- This is another area we had worked on tirelessly for months with no change. We would put him on a small tricycle or train and attempt to get him to move his legs. He had no desire to do this and now all of a sudden he is doing this.

5) Improvement with grooming etc- He is trying to help dress/undress himself, he is also trying to brush his own hair and he is more willing to wash his hands (this still freaks him out a bit because of his sensory issues but we are getting through it better, he is trying hard to do it)

6) Socialization-We are still working on social settings and he is doing great in this area as well. He continues to attend Gymboree and ABA therapy has added this as a goal as well. His therapist Lily is bringing him to the office for circle time and she is reporting positive things.

I know there are many more improvements but these are the big ones! We are just so thankful to see these gains and it makes the difficult times worth it!

I will continue to post updates as we continue on with CEASE therapy and the Hep B clearing.

Week 14 and 15- Hep B Clearing with CEASE Therapy

Since Noah had such a strong reaction to the 2 doses of Hep B 200C we had to put everything on hold this past week while his little body got better. I have to say this last week has been the most difficult yet of this clearing. We are still not sure what exactly was a detox reaction and what was sickness... all I know is that is was ROUGH. Vomiting, fever, ear infection, diarrhea, insomnia, congestion and cough, along with behavioral issues (biting), irritability and regression in language and lack of eye contact. I had a bit of a meltdown myself, especially when I saw the regressions. It was a hard week. And, I am so glad it is over and we are moving on.

This week we moved on to the 1m dose of Hep B. We are only dosing once this week. I am hoping for minimal aggravations and huge gains. Noah has rebounded and he is now doing great. Tons of language-- he is trying to communicate constantly which is so nice to see. He is understanding more and more language. He is doing awesome with eye contact once again and he is present and not in a fog.

I will try to do another post later this week to give you an update on how the 1M is coming along!

Week 13 Hep B 200C CEASE Therapy Update- This Week was Rough!

I am not going to sugar coat this past week. It was definitely challenging to say the least. We dosed Noah with Hep B 200C on Monday and Thursday last week. There were the recurrence of old symptoms (head shaking, side eyes, unsteady on his feet) and new stims I had never seen before (turning in circles, weird rituals with songs that he just started doing). He had more insomnia and irritability. More ear holding as well.

By Saturday Noah had become inconsolable and just miserable. I didn't know at the time but he was getting sick. He spiked a high fever (Im pretty sure it was over 103). By the time I started treating it and got a thermometer reading it was 103. Then he started vomiting EVERYWHERE. I had difficulty getting his temp down and keeping fluids in him. I was determined to treat this fever naturally... which I had never done before. I did this by keeping his body wrapped in luke warm towels and I also put wet cotton socks on and wool socks over his feet. This really seemed to bring the heat down his legs and it helped break his fever. It was amazing and very exciting to be able to treat his fever without the regular medicines that I have always gone to. He began to feel better mid day Sunday. I also gave him Hyland's earache tablets and put Mullein Garlic drops in his ears. I do believe he had an ear infection as this is exactly how he responds to them when he gets sick. I also think his ear infection is linked to the Hep B clearing. It just is shocking how strongly he responds to each and every level of this clearing. Confirming that the Hep B vaccination played a role in his current condition.

The gains we have seen this week: his receptive language (what he understands) continues to improve and he is responding to comments we are making and requests. He continues to improve in language and interaction with others. His little personality is coming out and he is making us laugh constantly. His eye contact has been awesome. My mother is reporting that she has seen a change with him as far as comprehending imaginative play (MAJOR!). She actually saw him playing with his toy cars and garage appropriately! So we continue to see consistent gains every week we do the clearing.

 The plan is to give Noah a diluted dose of 1M this week after he has a few more days of recovery. I will continue to post regular updates as we treat our son with CEASE therapy and homeopathy.

Am I in Denial or Am I Trusting God?

I had a thought the other day.... Am I in denial of the reality we have in front of us or am I just trusting God? I have just felt really calm lately regarding Noah's condition. I mean, I shouldn't be calm. I should be stressed out, emotional, upset, afraid of the future... but for some reason I am not. Most days I feel a deep peace.

I have read the statistics on autism and it isn't pretty at all. Recovery is a small percentage, marriages most of the time fail, people go bankrupt, children never leave home and cannot care for themselves. The list goes on and on. I know that this may be our reality one day but I guess I am just NOT accepting this future for us. I REFUSE to become yet another statistic. I will continue to fight for Noah's recovery with every breath left in my body. I will continue to fight for my marriage and my health and our finances. I am not going to let this condition called AUTISM destroy our lives. I am choosing to live with JOY when I shouldn't be doing it. I am choosing this mindset every day. I am trusting that God will direct our steps when it comes to treatments and interventions for Noah. I am believing that God has a wonderful plan for Noah, and for my family and that He will use this horribly painful time in our lives for a deeper purpose.

I guess I am just trying to say that I am making a choice to have HOPE-- I am clinging to it.  I have to believe that healing and recovery are possible for our little boy.